Have Mercy's, New Album, 'the loneliest place i've ever been' Review

Have Mercy’s new record, the loneliest place i’ve ever been, is a new, profoundly intimate Midwest-emo album, expected August 29 via Rude Records. Have Mercy has been a staple, iconic, band in the rock, metal, and emo scenes over the years. The band is based out of Baltimore and has been making music since 2009. In this time, with a break between 2020-2022, the band has now released their ninth studio album, two EPs, and many singles in between. In this new release, Frontman Brian Swindle reflects on the clarity gained in sobriety, and the emotional, heartfelt lyrics bring listeners along the ride of emotions that is life on life’s terms after experiencing life with the disease of active addiction.

“only, if only”, the opening track, is a declaration of new feelings in life. Yearning only, if only, would someone be viewed as their true self in real time, rather than their past mistakes, and not live in isolation. Feelings of weakness and loneliness are sang about, but the track gives a sense of strength and new beginnings. It is an honest and warming track to open the album up to their listeners.

The second track “august 17” brings the energy up with heavy guitar riffs and a strong lyrical presence. “I miss you / I’d say I love you every chance I get,” Swindle exclaims the should haves of when there was still time to make up the relationships that addiction can so damingly ruin. Whether it’s a loss of a loved one to death or distance, the pain is the same.

Next, the lovely track “little pieces”, is a declaration of a new self. “This is the person I wish I could be / This is who I was before you met me” This track is a beautiful representation that the mistakes made and the paths followed are not a permanent definition of who one is, and, that people are allowed to be, and usually, just as furious about their own choices and situations as anyone else is. “Put me back together again” a promise of healing, being capable where once there was only pain and brokenness.

“in my veins” is a harmonious storytelling song with softer, light guitar tones. “I’ve seen the sun come up once before”; this is a hopeful track, divulging hope to listeners along similar journeys. On the contrary, “old selfish me” is a track that expresses the feelings of loneliness, addiction, and sobriety can bring. Many people in recovery go through the stages of grief with their substance of choice, or losing the life of using substances as a whole. Addiction is a mental health disorder that can completely alter someone's life trajectory and the feelings they feel daily. Often, addiction is not a standalone mental illness, and a co-morbid one, but the root still comes from filling an internal void with a vice. The lyrics: “I want you here with me”, could be a love letter to an actual person, or the vice itself. Selfishness is the underlying principle in an addict’s spirit that needs to be addressed, using and sober. 

One of their singles released before the album,“tv glows”, is an honest reflection on the life that was once lived and the gratitude listed in being able to still be there for people now. This song so rawly displays how difficult it is to come back from a stage of active addiction in life. Not yearning for the days lost, but, rather instead, expressing that emotional presence is available now, if anyone wants to receive it still.

Have Mercy sets a new tone with “this could be gold”, starting to close out the album. More upbeat drum and guitar tones harmoniously balance together with Swindle’s melodic approach vocally. From what could have been to what could still be is intertwined in this track. Expect reflective pauses for each punching lyric within this track’s depths.

The lyrics to “faking a crush” are reminiscent of the feelings of grief and letting go of someone or something. It is about making the conscious decision about what is best, and choosing an independent path; one that, “I am on my own” is the path that is coming to bring healing. This song transitions into the second to last track, “what happy is”, perfectly. This track is a comforting call and acknowledges one’s faults in trying to find happiness in life. “This is the loneliest place I’ve ever been, but it’s the only place that I’ll learn to love again.” Going back to healing in places of pain, those feelings can be confusing about how to move forward. Have Mercy perfectly composed the way recovery feels in this track. This ties the album's meaning and longing for change, company, and, of course, the true meaning of happiness and healing all into one track.

Closing out the album is “medicine”. This track talks of wanting to feel and be okay, loving healthily again. Another declaration of going down this new path, even if uncertain, the path of healing is so beautifully displayed. “I wanna be better / I want to be best, for you, for me, for everyone I meet.” The most important part of healing and mending all the pain and suffering inflicted by life is by healing one’s inner self first. That is exactly what Have Mercy’s the loneliest place i’ve ever been is all about. Escaping the lonliest feelings, in the painful process, and places, of reintegrating back into life, and putting mental health and healing journeys at the forefront of ‘selfishness’ now.